So I'm mid-way into week 16, and feel like I'm fighting off a serious depressive slide. I ran on Tuesday - which I desperately wanted to do, but even as I was lacing up my shoes I also knew might be a bad idea. The first mile felt fine - not great, not totally pain/discomfort free - but ok. The second mile, not so much. But the pain wasn't isolated to my metatarsal - in fact, sometimes that felt fine and other random places felt uncomfortable. And since I was a mile out on the trail, and I switched to heel-striking to minimize the impact, I gutted it out. I knew even then I might've f'ed myself.
Right after the run it actually felt ok. The bone felt ok, that is, but other things in my foot were tweaked. Today, 2 days later, I think the bone might be sore again and definitely there are some other things sore. So I'm back on the elliptical, for I don't know how long.
And I'm seriously unhappy about it. I had this dream that I'd be able to start running this week, build up to a 8-9 mile run 10 days before the race, and go into the race knowing I could do it. Now i don't even know if I'll be able to run even once before the actual race.
I started thinking that I should bail. Not do the race. I mean, if I can't run for 9 weeks before the race, what the hell am I doing showing up? Not to mention the fact that my bike fit sucks and I'm constantly uncomfortable and how the fuck did that happen when I was totally fine on the bike a few months ago? So really, maybe I shouldn't do the race.
But I don't think I can do that. I've been working my ass off preparing for the damn thing. I can't imagine just stopping, and not doing anything with all that. Plus I've been looking forward to that post-race break, that feeling of having accomplished a goal and taking a deserved week off. So I think I have to show up anyway, and just gut it out. I don't really know what else to do.